24 Hour Something

Yesterday I lived a day I hope I'll never have to live again. Wednesday night I unsuspectingly completed my nightly routine of reading in bed until about 10:35, then turned off my light and was asleep sometime not long after. At 1:00 am Thursday morning I woke up to aching ears and an aching throat.  But it was like no ache I've ever experienced.  I've had sore throats before.  And my ears have hurt before.  This was an all new level.  I rolled over and tried to go back to sleep.  It was no good.  Every time I was almost out, I would have to swallow to calm my parched throat, and it would send my ears into a new dimension of pain and it felt like I was trying to force a tennis ball down my throat.  Needless to say, it also jolted me back awake.  So for the next four hours I tossed and turned and wished either I could sleep or it would be time to wake up so I could just get on with the miserable day I was starting to realize was ahead of me.  Finally, 5am surfaced and I crawled out of bed and faced my day.  By this time, the ache had moved completely from my ears and concentrated in my throat.  It felt like I had stones sitting deep in my throat, constricting any swallowing or breathing action.  I tried sucking on a lozenge, but I would have had to suck on it somewhere near my adams apple (do girls have adams apples?) to have any effect, so mostly I just numbed my tongue.  I googled throat pain, symptoms, and relief, and basically found that it's probably just a cold (not like any cold I've ever had) and I should gargle salt water.  I tried  that and got nowhere.  I was super hungry but couldn't imagine putting anything bigger than a flax seed down my throat, so I sucked on a piece of Life cereal as I headed out the door.  I've already scheduled all my vacation days (and plan to use them for something better than sitting on my couch crying in pain), so I went to work.  By the time I got there, I still hadn't talked to anybody, so when I said hello to my coworkers, I realized my voice wasn't mine.  You know when you get milk stuck in the back of your throat and your voice goes funny?  That was my voice all day yesterday.  I'm guessing that basically, whatever was swollen in my throat was blocking my vocal chords.  I know Christy's kids have dealt with tonsilitis, and that's the only thing I could imagine this might be (I like to go straight to the big stuff), so I started texting her for solutions.  She suggested ibuprofen to help with the swelling.  I tried that and guess what?  I've discovered another migraine trigger!  20 minutes later I was deep in the thralls of a migraine, complete with stomach issues.  I haven't taken ibuprofen in a couple years because I started noticing that it never helped with my migraines (ta da!  it was probably adding to them!) and I always got stomach aches when I took it.  The swelling in my throat did go down and the ache was muted, but for the rest of the day I was basically useless as I sat slumped in my chair with my head in my hands, and with a very quick digestive turnaround.  I had a dentist appointment after work, and then I went to a medical clinic to get my throat looked at.  I just couldn't bare the thought of another night and day like I had just experienced.  The doctor spent about a minute looking at me, told me it wasn't strep, was probably just the early signs of a cold, and that I should gargle warm salt water.  She probably thought I was an alarmist who goes to the doctor every time I get a splinter or hang nail.  I felt like shaking her and telling her this was really bad.  I'm the person who once had a phlegmy cough for two months and didn't go to the doctor.  I'm the person who once had a really, really itchy rash for five months before I mentioned it to my doctor as a sidenote at a regular appointment.  For me to fork over a $40 copay to get a sore throat checked out on the first day is saying something!  But she didn't know that.  So great.  I was right back to where I'd been 13 hours earlier with google.  I went home and cried a little.  So I went to bed early and hoped to get a little sleep in before it all started up again.  Instead I slept soundly until 5am dawned this morning and my throat didn't hurt at all.  It's as if yesterday never happened.  I'm wiped out from my migraine (I'm always a little woozy the day after a bad one), but whatever that sore throat was has left as quickly and furiously as it came.  Good luck to wherever it's going!  One of my coworkers took the picture below as I sat at my desk yesterday morning.